Rare Relationships
“I’ve set my roots down here; it isn’t easy to leave. I’m not here because I want to be anymore.”
“People are heartless. Ten years of living in this spot, and only being given two days to leave is a joke.”
“This is all like a bad dream, really. Doesn’t seem real. My whole world has been collapsing the last few days. It literally felt like the end of the world to me.”
“Man, I hate this! I need an advocate right now.”
“I love you all. It’s hard to say that, because that isn’t something I tell people much. You’ve been there for me when no one else has.”
“My sister can’t help any. She doesn’t have much, her.”
“I need a miracle.”
“I can’t do all of this alone. I need your all’s help more than I ever did before, so try to think of something that will deliver me from this pit of despair.”
“I’m trying not to die from all this stress.”
“My animals need me, and I need my animals.”
“There is such a thing as being homeless homeless. Homeless without an encampment is rock-bottom hardship. The absolute worst.”
“We think sometimes that poverty is only being hungry, naked, and homeless. The poverty of being unwanted, unloved, and uncared for is the greatest poverty.” - Mother Theresa
While we often think of poverty as a lack of financial resources. That lack is compounded or coupled with the lack of nurturing relationships along with stigma and shame that makes fostering these relationships impossible. While it is easy to recognize someone’s lack of shelter, sanitation, clean clothing, income, or food, there is often no obvious way to tell when someone lacks supportive relationships. As many as 1 in 3 people experiencing homelessness have lost their social support systems. As many as 1 in 2 Americans are a paycheck or two away from not being able to pay rent. So what is it that is making up the difference between the current reality of over 6 million people experiencing homelessness in the United States and the creation of a reality where tens of millions of people would be experiencing homelessness? In large part this hasn’t become the case because our friends, family members, teachers, classmates, neighbors, coworkers, congregations, clubs, and community organizations are making up the difference.
Aside from lacking housing, this relational poverty may be the most universal characteristic of people experiencing homelessness. This characteristic is also universally linked through research to show that when someone does not have strong relationships, they are susceptible to poorer physical and mental health, as well as a higher likelihood of victimization. And the reverse is true when there are strong nurturing relationships present. Community and connection are essential. It is estimated that prolonged isolation is able to decrease a person’s lifespan by 15 years. This is equivalent to the effects of smoking 15 cigarettes a day! Relational poverty is deadly, and the longer a person remains homeless, the deadlier that chronic loneliness becomes.
At the ROC we don’t take the relationships we build with our clients lightly, and we believe our clients don’t either. This year there will be an increased effort for the ROC to encourage the communities in the midst of those experiencing homelessness to be bold enough to take a step closer, to take a minute longer, to speak more words, and to get to know their homeless neighbors. Because not only can those relationships save people experiencing homelessness’ lives, but they also can completely change the lives of those who are housed. While these types of relationships are currently rare, we hope to make them more reoccurring. We believe that could ROC the world as we know it!
#ROCAndRoll
#ROCRetrospective
#RareRelationships
